[The feed clicks on, but the surroundings are probably unfamiliar to at least 99% of the Thor's inhabitants. That is, unless they have ever been inside their TV sets before, in which case, maybe they DO recognize what they're looking at. Space TV land is a strange place, but the basic glimpses are of a jungle, fuzzy from the bad reception, even ( Read more... )

[Gintoki's guide feed starts off with a sickening crunch, followed by a flash of static. There's another five-second pause before the video feed actually starts, ( miraculously broadcasting right-side up (but at an odd angle)] )

[You know that foreboding feeling one usually gets before someone gets offed in a horror movie?]

[That's pretty much what's preceding this post as Jade fumbles with his Guide and turns the camera on, right above a peacefully slumbering (re: almost dead) Gintoki]I thought it prudent that I take matters into my own hands this time around. I hereby ( Read more... )

[the video feed clicks on to show Gintoki holding it eye-level]

[his face is bone-white and he looks, for lack of a better word, fucking terrified]Oi. Oi oi oi. Oi, Pattsuan. Where are you? Where've you been ( Read more... )

The colors and sound skip and suddenly Shouyou is back in focus, the picture oversaturated like before, a very obvious continuation of the dream he had previously. Despite the debacle surrounding his latest guide broadcast, Gintoki clearly had no trouble getting back to sleep, thanks to the strawberry milk ( Read more... )

( Oh look who's having a dream )

[the video feed flickers on to show Gintoki, surrounded by what looks like about ten huge bottles of liquor. He regards the camera with an even, flat stare -- he's not drunk yet, but the thick line marking the remaining alcohol in the bottle closest to him (a pessimist would say half empty) suggests that he is well on his way.]Oi. I can't drink all ( Read more... )

[Okay guys, Gintoki doesn't really do Christmas or Christmas gifts, being pretty Japanese and all. A Christmas cake and some mikan, yeah, but gift exchanges? Naaah. So imagine his surprise when he got gifts this year. And now that he feels like a right douche, everyone who got him a gift will find this inside an envelope with their name on it, put ( Read more... )

[All members connected to the interwebs via the guide will find a document entitled yorozuyapromo.doc on their guides. Upon opening it, they'll be greeted with a simple document headed with the words, ( THE YOROZUYA AND YOU: A PRIMER )

[the feed clicks on to show Shinpachi in a very ridiculous reindeer outfit, standing outside the Yorozuya, which just so happens to be sporting a brand new sign]

[a certain silver-haired samurai's voice comes from behind the guide]

All right, Shinpachi, this all has to be done in one take, so stand strong and speak loud, aa? Pull your antlers up, ( Read more... )